Los Angeles, California (The Hollywood Times) 5/22/2021 – Melissa Van Oss is a Mid-West transplant to Washington, D.C. She embraced city life becoming involved in a private underground world that few see inside of, she pushed past her own fears, insecurities and barriers, and came out the other side transformed into a confident, adventurous spirit… a fearless Seducer. Melissa is a Seduction Visionary, Best-Selling author, speaker, and coach. She is the author of Exploring the Art of Seduction (to) Transform your Confidence. She uses her experiences in the world of Seduction to help others understand Seduction As A Second Language and how it translates into more confidence from the bedroom to the boardroom.
You are a Midwestern who left for Washington, D.C. Tell us about your background.
I grew up in a very small town. We have one traffic light. There is also only one bank, florist, barbershop, and a grocery store owned by a prominent family in the community. We did have a Dairy Queen though. I like to say that if you blink, you will miss my town. It’s a small country town that has a population with more soybeans than people. A very close, tight-knit community where everybody knows your name. It’s the kind of all-American place where kids can safely ride their bikes without parental supervision, where 4-H reigns supreme in the summer, and everyone looked forward to the county fair every August. It’s the kind of place where you know your neighbors personally, along with everyone else in town. It’s a place where the whole town looks forward to Friday night lights, the smell of the concession stand in the air, and the whistles and cheers from the crowd signaling it’s the weekend. I spent summers on my grandparents 25 acre farm doing 4-H projects, running around in the hay and dirt, helping in the garden, or doing some sort of project with our grandparents. I studied Fashion Merchandising and Marketing, and graduated from Kent State University Cum Laude with a Bachelor of Science degree. Go Golden Flashes! My first out of college, I interned for a high-end custom clothing company. It was a great first job and my introduction into the “work world.” I have always worked with very high-end executives, CEO’s, attorneys and other type-A personalities. That’s probably why I have always had an interest in studying human nature and the psychology of what makes people tick. Based on the many adventures I was having and what I was learning, I launched my sensual couples workshops and coaching where I help couples bring more passion and sizzle back to their love life. I do this mainly through using the art of Seduction which has its own unique language which can be used to boost your confidence in all areas of your life. Seduction is a skill and can be learned, I am the guide that will show you the way. People are often surprised at how much the art of Seduction can add to their life and how this new way of thinking can transform you from the inside out.
Share a monumental moment in your life.
That’s a good/tough question- there are so many… There are two that stand out for me so it’s hard to select just one. The first one was when I was in college. Like so many other people, I had to work full- time and I also took full-time classes so it wasn’t the most glamorous or the usual college experience with football games and parties. I didn’t complain because I was excited to be studying at one of the most prestigious Fashion Schools in the country where there’s stiff competition to get into the program. I took my studies and classes seriously, never missing a Dean’s List. No matter how many open-close weekend shifts I had to work in the retail world, I was prepared to do it so I could make my dream of becoming a college graduate a reality . I decided when I started college that I would maintain the Dean’s list and graduate with honors… No matter what. And that’s just what I did, I graduated with high honors, wearing those Golden Key National Honor Society cords never felt so wonderful. That day taught me the value of believing in myself and knowing that through hard work and determination anything I set my mind to was possible.
Fast-forward to — I decide to write a book. I decide it has to hit #1 best-seller. I find other people who have done what I want to do, connect with them and figure out the secret sauce. From the time I decided to write the book until the day it launched, I told myself I was a best-seller, there was nothing that would stand in my way to attain this goal/dream. I knew what the outcome would be and I let the Universe figure out the HOW of it. I believed I would achieve best-seller status just like when I decided in college I would graduate and with honors. And sure enough, the day my book launched on Amazon, it hits #1 Best-Seller status in multiple categories including: self-help, relationships and long-term marriages, love & romance, and sexuality by 2 P.M. To say I was beyond ecstatic would be the understatement of all time. I have always wanted to be a best-selling author from the time I was in elementary school. We had a contest each year in grade school where we had to write, illustrate and create our own stories. Each grade level would have the top three books in the class and one person from each elementary school would get to go to the “Young Author’s Conference” with our teacher. It was a great honor to win…plus the winner also got a day away from school so that’s always a plus as a child. When I was in fourth grade, my book won that year for my class and not only that but I also got to go to the “Young Author’s Conference”, it was one of the highlights of my young life. That’s where the seed of becoming a best-seller sprang from and achieving it is a real highlight for me.
You are a Seduction Visionary, Best-Selling Author, and Coach. Tell us about your book, Exploring the Art of Seduction (to) Transform your Confidence.
It’s my origin story, if you will, about growing up in the country and moving to the city and some of the fun adventures I had along the way. I discuss how I found the art of Seduction which ultimately transformed me, my confidence, and my life.
Even after getting an amazing education and having worked at so many great corporate positions, they never really showed me how to fully evaluate myself as well as those around me in the same way that the art of Seduction has. So when I stumbled across all these various books and other resource material, I realized this was the magic ingredient I had been missing all along. Learning that the art of Seduction is all about persuasion was an aha moment. I understood it had many universal applications. This set me off onto a journey that I haven’t looked back from since starting over 12+ years ago. I began to do what I like to call my ‘little social experiments’ – where I would learn about a particular tip or technique and I would set out the same results on a consistent basis so I knew I was onto something. I grew my social experiments to include close family or girlfriends who happily tested out the Seduction tip that I told them about. And again and again, they were getting the same result. This led me to create various workshops, couples coaching, and speaking so that I can share my message with as many people as possible. Writing the book was the natural next step in getting the message out there that Seduction isn’t a bad word. Seduction can bring a lot to your life. Seduction is an art form. Seduction skills are so much more than just leading someone toward s.e.x. Having a Seduction mindset brings much more fun, creativity, sizzle, spice, and passion to all areas in your life. That’s why I was so excited to write this book and share this great resource with more people so I can guide them toward becoming a fearless Seducer. Once you have the Seducer’s Aura you will confidently be ready to take on the challenges of your day because you know the whole world is your mysterious playground ready and waiting for you to explore it. I couldn’t be happier that it hit Best- Seller on Amazon. It is the first book in a three-part series.
What are key areas that can bring confidence from the bedroom to the boardroom?
What I love the most about the art of Seduction is that above anything else, it’s a mindset first that later becomes your way of life. Seduction is its own unique language which is why I crafted a whole brand around this idea. Seduction often gets a ‘bad rap’ as just being a means to end for s.e.x. Or learning some pick-up artist manipulations… that version of Seduction leaves a bad taste in my mouth. When you only look at the art of Seduction on such a superficial level, you lose the whole point. Seduction is like a fine wine with a deliciously prepared meal where everything works in harmony with one another. Seduction is like an incredible movie that takes you away so much so that you lose track of yourself, time, and anything else that was previously in your mind. They don’t call it the art of Seduction for no reason. When thinking about art, architecture design, or fashion; each person has their own interpretation of that work. That’s because we bring our own life experiences, thoughts, ideas, and perspective to each piece of art we view. The art of Seduction is no different. It is so much more than what it appears at first glance.
Seduction as previously mentioned has its own language. One which has its own verbiage, nuances, and applications and practice makes perfect. The way I look at Seduction is that at its core, it’s all about persuasion. When you look at Seduction through the lense of persuasion, it begins to take on a new shape. And if you think about it, you are being persuaded all day, every day anyway. Whether it is someone trying to persuade you to buy their services, or products like what car you drive, the fashion labels you wear, what cell phone you have, et cetera. You name it every day we are being bombarded by people, places and things trying to persuade us to ___ fill in the blank. But when you understand the art of Seduction, you will be able to see when people are trying to persuade you so you can thoroughly evaluate it before you impulse shop, make the wrong business decision, or decide if you want to date a new person. When you know how-to do the persuading, you will find those skills suddenly come in handy when you are negotiating a raise with your boss, or closing a 7-figure deal… You are either doing the persuading or being persuaded… which side do you prefer?
That’s where it gets really exciting for me…. Once you start to understand the mindset piece and gain a new perspective about people and situations around you… the fun begins. You start to think like a chess master- strategizing and knowing your next 5 moves as well as your opponents. The art of Seduction is played and studied like a great chess match. The more you learn and grow, the more interested you become in the subject.
When you start to see the world through Seducer’s Eyes with the proper mindset and perspective, over time your skills begin to naturally transcend as merely a means to an end in the bedroom into this becoming part of your DNA. It is your way of life. Confidence in yourself and your new abilities translate into confidence in all other areas of your life including all the way to the boardroom.
Tell us about the Sexy Recipe Of The Month Club.
The Sexy Recipe of the Month Club is for those who want that monthly dose of inspiration, creativity, and fun added back into their love life. I’ve found that some couples, especially those in a long-term relationship, can often feel like they get stuck in a rut with the same old routine. Essentially their relationship is on auto-pilot…slow, steady, and predictable. It’s a great way to safely reach your destination but not as memorable, scenic or fun. Sometimes we all need an injection of fun, creativity, and inspiration… that’s where the Sexy Recipe of the Month Club comes in to save the day! It’s the only recipe club where absolutely no culinary skills are required. The only skills you need are the willingness to try new things, be open to new ideas and ways of thinking, think creatively, have enthusiasm, and have the ability to push past your comfort zone.
What do you enjoy the most when working with couples?
There are so many things I enjoy when working with couples. I really admire when couples make the health of their relationship a priority because it shows just how much they love and care for their partner. They want to learn and make more of an effort so that their relationship can stand the test of time. I am constantly reminding people that the romance doesn’t end with the “I do’s” that’s just the beginning…
What you did to ‘snag’ that person doesn’t stop just because you may be married, consciously coupled, or whatever relationship status you find yourself in. Couples who want to keep their relationship alive, healthy and strong know the value of adding in new ways of thinking, being creative and seeking alternatives to keep it fresh. I enjoy working with couples without regard to how long they have been one. I have worked with people who are new into a dating relationship as well as couples who have been married longer than I have been alive… they all want one thing… Keep the sizzle and spice alive in their love life.
Tell us about your upcoming speaking engagements/workshops. What topics will you share?
I am doing a Mastermind with a global networking group later this summer focusing on “How-To Win by Not Selling (using Seduction instead)” as well as “Adopting the Seduction Mindset to Become More Memorable in Your Business.” I do a monthly workshop for members of the Sexy Recipe of The Month Club called “Seduction – Real World.” This is where I, Seduction and sex, dive deeper into hot topics, as well as do Q & A’s. It’s very interactive and always a lot of fun.
This Fall, I will be launching my best-selling book, Exploring the Art of Seduction, into paperback along with hosting a book signing. I am also working on the final edits for my up-coming signature program called, Seduction As A Second Language. Your study of Seduction deepens if you understand the hierarchy of Seduction. These are the high-value insights you are looking for to push past your boundaries as you become a fearless Seducer This is for those looking to go beyond surface level or pick up artist tricks, these are the real gems that you have been looking for. I am available for corporate keynotes, workshops, and retreats. I am happy to discuss how I can adapt the art of Seduction to help you grow your brand. I recently joined Clubhouse as well so I can’t wait to dive in. I am looking forward to hosting my own room very soon.
Personal Facebook Page https://www.facebook.com/melissa.vanoss.7/
Exploring the Art of Seduction Group https://www.facebook.com/groups/894306494753592